LAcation

So I came down to LA (from my new home in Portland, OR) for a friend's birthday and then decided to stay a month until another friend's wedding (mid august to mid september). I've been hanging around, moving from couch to bed to couch again between lots of fantastic LA and Orange County friends and doing a whole lot of nothing. I read, go online, watch DVDs, play guitar, accompany friends on errands, shop, ETC and in the evenings I usually find myself drinking and smoking with my buddies. I have no responsibility, no obligations, no job, no whatever....

I should be blissed out, right? Why do I feel like I'm just killing time? Don't get me wrong, I'm having fun and enjoying hanging out with all these cool people, but part of me feels totally dead. I find myself feeling the impulse to get back to Portland already, but why? What am I returning to? What is there to look forward to? Getting a job?

This is such a weird time in my life. I'm twenty-two. I've just graduated from college and I'm extremely privileged. I have more mobility than I know what to do with and faced with knowing that the world is my proverbial oyster, I just want to go back to bed.

why i'm obsessed with Vh1's "The Pick-Up Artist"

For the first time in the history of my family, we have cable. So a few weeks ago I stumbled upon a show on VH1 called "The Pick-Up Artist." The show is hosted by a tall, skinny, perpetually hat-and-ski-goggles clad obvious ex-nerd named Mystery and the premise: 12 nerdy ass dudes, ranging from a 45 year old virgin to a 22 year old anxiety stricken cutie, come live in a mansion and learn how to talk to, pick up, make out with, and date W O M E N. Each week a dude is eliminated based on how well he puts Mystery's "teachings" into action. The last man standing will earn the title "Master Pick-Up Artist" and travel the world with Mystery teaching other wayward dudes how to talk to ladies. K?

Without a doubt, the show is sexist. Women, during episodes, are frequently compared to children and animals. In the club, the men of the show are encouraged to approach their "target." It's the typical misogynist bullshit that makes my feminist blood boil. But I can't stop watching it.

I'm completely hooked and here's why: Yes, Mystery is a chauvinist who looks to be seeking revenge on the women who shunned him when younger and nerdier. But the men, the 12 participants, could not be more sweet. Imagine men. On television. Being insecure and emotional. Not for laughs. These dudes are insecure. They want relationships. The openly admit that they are terrified of women. And they obviously love eachother. Unlike the inevitable drama among competitors on shows like "American's Next Top Model," these guys are really looking out for eachother, providing support through ups and downs. During elimination it is not uncommon to see tears. A lot of tears. Especially from the bottom two, the one that stays ultimately crying, hugging and consoling the one that is eliminated. Where can you see that on television?

does that make me sound like an alcoholic? part 2

met up with brad tonight. he's in town visiting for a little while. (it's strange - so far the only people i've been hanging out with have been people that are just visiting portland - it really makes me feel like i'm just on vacation) he was hanging out with emily heller & co. at a bar/arcade. we played one round of dance, dance revolution and felt thoroughly embarassed. then a bunch of kids took off and me, brad, emily and her bf alec just wandered around downtown. it was nice to just be out walking around at night which i haven't done at all yet. it's so weird. i'm so reluctant. i feel totally wary of this town, of liking it, of settling down. i want to run away. ANYWAYS. we wandered around and ended up hitting up some fancy hotels - taking elevators up to random floors and then walking the halls looking for room service trays and carts. we only found one tray but don't call the adventure a bust or my awesome new salt and pepper shaker set will have to bodyslam you.

does that make me sound like an alcoholic?

i'm a bad blogster. i don't know what to write on these things. i had a delicious burger today. it had whole cloves of roasted garlic on it. (is that blog worthy?) I also got buzzed on half a beer because I am a GIANT lightweight. it was a fun time though. everything is better when buzzed.

I went with my parents to see two houses today that just went on the market. One was HUGE but sort of unimpressive. The inside was really pink and though the floorplan was nice and I could probably live in the basement for six years without anyone noticing, the fact that it was right off the freeway sort of killed it for everyone. The second house had a lot more character, a craftsman in the NW section of the city. It was really rad, in a nice neighborhood, close-ish to 23rd street, but the kitchen was old and small and the rooms were too few and too small to make a B&B. I was ready to make an offer, but alas I'm not the ones with all the moolah.

i think i need to watch more female comedians and musicians

i am troubled by my response to things that make me happy... instead of thinking, "hey i want to do that" (regarding people making music or comedy) i think, "i want to date someone who does that"

time to stop living vicariously through boys.

there was a time
you dreamed of
small houses here
nestled among these
spiked trees
and a porch
to sit after dinner
with a guitar
and me.

these days you are
across a continent
swallowed up by
the biggest city
to break my heart.

the trees are pointier here

Portland, OR.

My family and I moved into our very small, vaguely ugly, little white box of an apartment. We brought far too much furniture and it's feeling a little like housesitting for a giant. who is also a packrat. Everything is too big and there's too much of it.
BUT! It is only temporary until my rents find a huge lovely house that can rival old 545 S. Grand St... And there's a pool, hot tub and fitness center very close by. So.

It's very strange to be living in a new place. Here are some things I've noticed about Oregon:

The trees are less round than in California. Also, there are more of them.

Californians really are just on average more attractive. Sorry, rest of the world.

I guess that's it.

Oregon: good if you like trees and uggos.